Along the course of this article, we will be discussing about a very significant topic that is, in Islam how to sleep with wife. Islam teaches us how you can follow the rules of living, in a halal way. Allah has created us all in pairs and we should always keep in mind that, he is the best of planners.
Through the sacred act of marriage, Islam binds a man and a woman in its entirety. A husband and his wife should complement each other and it is obligatory for them to support each other mentally as well as physically. For the bond to be strong, it is of utmost importance that there exists affection, tranquility, mercy, and love.
How are you supposed to sleep with your wife? Islam provides a comprehensive guideline regarding this issue. The more you learn the more you understand. There are certain things you have to consider when you are in a halal relationship like marriage. A Muslim must gather proper knowledge about the do’s and don’ts when it comes to sleeping with your wife.
In Islam – How Do You Sleep With Your Wife?
Muslim Life Partner?
It is essential for all Muslims to know the etiquette of sexual intimacy and to have knowledge of how to sleep with wife. Even those who are single or still searching for a partner should become familiar with these rules so that they can be implemented according to the guidance of shari’ah when someone gets married.
The companionship between a husband and his wife is built upon responsibility, respect, love, care, and affection. A man and his wife must remain together through thick and thin. You must keep in mind that sleeping with your wife or having sexual intercourse itself is a form of worship. It is the responsibility of the husband to fulfill his wife’s sexual desires.
It is of utmost importance that you caress your wife. You need to speak to her with love and passion. You need to understand what Islam considers as lawful as well as unlawful sexual acts.
أُحِلَّ لَكُمْ لَيْلَةَ الصِّيَامِ الرَّفَثُ إِلَىٰ نِسَائِكُمْ ۚ هُنَّ لِبَاسٌ لَّكُمْ وَأَنتُمْ لِبَاسٌ لَّهُنَّ
‘uhill lakum laylat alsiyam alrrafath ‘iilaa nisayikum ۚ hunn libas llakum wa’antum libas llahunn
It is lawful for you during the night of fasting to go out to your women ۚ They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them
وَالَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا
walladhin yaqulun rabbana hab lana min ‘azwajina wadhuriyaatina qurrat ‘aeyun wajealna lilmuttaqin ‘iimaman
And to those who say in prayer, “Allah! Grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us the lead to righteous path.”
The above verses of the Quran consist of a very powerful meaning. It means, your wives are supposed to provide you pleasure, consolation & comfort. By reciting these verses daily, you will be rewarded with happiness & peace in your conjugal life. Also, if you are planning on having a child, Shaytan will never be able to do any harm to the child.
Whenever the husband desires to have sexual intercourse with his wife, it is her responsibility to fulfill his needs. However, provided that the wife is suffering from any form of physical illness, that prevents her to have intercourse with her husband, in such cases, the wife needs to meet her husband’s needs in a that is fulfilling for the husband. You also need to remember that it is strictly forbidden in Islam to engage in sexual intercourse with your wife during her menstrual cycle.
وَيَسْـَٔلُونَكَ عَنِ ٱلْمَحِيضِ ۖ قُلْ هُوَ أَذًۭى فَٱعْتَزِلُوا۟ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فِى ٱلْمَحِيضِ ۖ وَلَا تَقْرَبُوهُنَّ حَتَّىٰ يَطْهُرْنَ ۖ فَإِذَا تَطَهَّرْنَ فَأْتُوهُنَّ مِنْ حَيْثُ أَمَرَكُمُ ٱللَّهُ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يُحِبُّ ٱلتَّوَّٰبِينَ وَيُحِبُّ ٱلْمُتَطَهِّرِينَ
Wa yas’aloonaka ‘anil maheedi qul huwa azan fa’tazilun nisaaa’a fil maheedi wa laa taqraboo hunna hattaa yathurna fa-izaa tatah-harrna faatoohunna min haisu amarakumul laah; innallaaha yuhibbut Tawwaabeena wa yuhibbul mutatahhireen
“They question thee (O Muhammad) concerning menstruation. Say: It is an illness, so let women alone at such time and go not in unto them till they are cleansed. And when they have purified themselves, then go in unto them as Allah SAW enjoined upon you. Truly Allah love those who turn unto Him, and love those who have a care for cleanness.
Which side should the wife should sleep in according to Islam?
Before going to bed Muslims should maintain the Islamic ritual, such as performing wudu. Also, you must purify yourself by washing certain body parts thoroughly, using water, this is a Sunnah. Prophet Muhammad PBUH said –
“Whenever you wish to go to bed, perform Wudu (like you do for Salah prayer).“
Sahih al-Bukhari 135; book 4, hadith 1
So, which side should the wife sleep in according to Islam? In Islam, there’s no specific side mentioned for the wife to sleep. It’s the decision between husband and wife based on mutual understanding.
- The Sunnah is before going to bed you must dust the bed thrice.
- Begin your sleep on the right side, it’s Sunnah for both husband and wife.
It is narrated in the Sahih hadith that Prophet Muhammad PBUH used to sleep on his right side, putting his hand on his right cheek. Therefore, sleeping on the right side is a Sunnah. It is also proven by medical science that sleeping on your right side is beneficial for your health.
In Islam How to Sleep with Wife?
Islam can provide you a comprehensive guidelines about all aspects of life; it is a complete way of life. Allah SWT has mentioned within the Quran, how should the relationship be between a husband and his wife.
So, in Islam how are you supposed to sleep with your husband? How one should prepare themselves before having sexual intercourse? What are the rules according to Islam? What must they avoid and what they are allowed to do? These are some of the most common questions that might be going through your mind when you start your conjugal life. So here are the answers that Islam has provided you:
- According to Islam, a husband, and his wife must sleep together. Couples are allowed to have intimate time during the daytime as well. Intimacy amongst partners is considered a form of ibadah. If you are romantic towards each other, Allah SAW will reward you for that.
- Whenever your better half is willing to participate in sexual intercourse, then, it becomes a necessity to fulfill each other’s needs. Islam has no restrictions about the intimacy between husband and wife, as long as you perform all the sexual acts in a halal way.
- The husband and the wife must cleanse themselves before performing sexual intercourse. Using fragrance is also a good way to excite your husband.
- You can engage in sexual intercourse with your husband anytime except when you’re on your period. It’s not permissible in Islam to have sex during the menstrual cycle.
- It is compulsory for you to maintain all forms of privacy when you become intimate with your husband. You must ensure all necessary precautions so that there’s no breach of privacy.
- According to Islam, a wife must follow all the necessary in order to please her husband.
Prophet Muhammad PBUH said-
“If a woman dies in a state where her husband is pleased with her, then, she will enter Jannah.”
Sunnah of Sleeping with Wife
According to Islam, marriage is Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad SAW. This is a legal and compulsory act for all Muslims. As you might already know that marriage is half your deen. Getting married means, you hold the responsibility of fulfilling your partner’s needs, this is obligatory for a husband and his wife.
Husbands must be affectionate and loving towards his wife. You must never be abusive towards your spouse, never take your spouse for granted. Remember, your partner is the one who is meant to be with you for a lifetime, so, they deserve your complete support. Therefore, you must behave gently way with your spouse.
“The most perfect of believers are those most perfect of character, and the best of you are the best of you to your spouses.”
Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1162
Book 12, Hadith 17
- Having private time with your wife is a necessity, this is something that you should not be worried about. You must provide your spouse with some quality time to cuddle, caress and fulfill their needs.
- While having sexual intercourse with your wife prefer not to do this act in the direction of Qibla. As you face this direction while performing daily Salah.
- Spouses should occupy the same bed, it is a Sunnah for the husband and wife to share the same bed.
- Spouses should not sleep separately. But if there’s a valid reason for doing so then they can.
How to be a Good Muslim Wife in Bed?
To be a good wife, you must obey and respect your husband’s wishes. As a perfect Muslima, you must perform your daily prayers and recite Quran, often. This ensures that your responsibility as a wife is performed properly. Marriage is a blessing bestowed upon us by Allah SWT. In the Holy Quran, the word nikah has been mentioned many times and it is held in absolute glory. The Prophet SAW said:
“Marriage is my Sunnah, and whoever does not follow my Sunnah has nothing to do with me”.
Sunan Ibn Majah 1846
Book 9, Hadith 2
To be a successful Muslim wife, you must prioritize things which make your husband happy. Assure your husband that you will always be there to support him during tough times.
- Being respectful and loyal toward your spouse is a necessity for a happy conjugal life. Building taqwa and obeying your husband is a sign of a good Muslima.
- You need to understand your husband’s desire, work accordingly and make him feel better when he is with you. Make him understand that, you love him, care for him and you genuinely miss him when he is not around. Express your physical affection towards him. Remember to compliment him for his love, care and support for you.
- A wife must fulfill her husband’s sexual desire. Both husband and wife should recite “Bismillaah, Allahuma jannabnash shaytana wa jannabish shaytana maa razaqtanaa” before performing sexual intercourse.
This means – In the name of Allah, O Allah! Save us from the Shaytan and prevent Shaytan from that which you grant us (children).
- It is of utmost importance for you to enjoy each other’s companionship. The holy Qu’ran encourages spouses to mutually satisfy each other while performing sexual intercourse.
- Flirt with your husband and enjoy foreplay, as Allah SAW encourages you to do so. You must make sure to perform ghusl as soon as possible after sexual intercourse.
Allaahumma laa taj,’Al lish shayTaani feemaa razaqtanee naSeebaa
Couples must recite the aforementioned dua during ejaculation. But do not recite it loudly, both husband and wife must utter this in your mind.
Meaning: O Allah! Do not grant Shaytaan any share of that which you have granted me.
Narrated in the Holy Quran:
“He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts).”
- Surah Ar-Rum ; 30:21
Marriage is the most beautiful source of connection that Allah SWT has established for couples.
Is sleeping together important?
As we know, marriage is Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad PBUH. So, after marriage Islam does not encourage couples to sleep separately (read more: How Long Husband and Wife can Live Separately) . Sleeping together is of utmost important for married couples. Which side of the bed should you sleep? This should be a decision between a husband and his wife based on mutual understanding, it is recommended that you begin your sleep on the right side. This is a Sunnah for all Muslims.
Before going to bed recite the following –
Recite surah Ikhlas., Falak and AN-nas as this is a Sunnah.
Also perform the following dhikr before sleep:
SubhanAllah (glory to be Allah), Alhamdulillah (praise to Allah), Allahu Akbar (Allah is great) recite 33 times, each.
This article will provide you with various ayats that can act as a guideline on how to sleep with wife in Islam. You should not be aggressive towards your wife. It is important that you treat her with love, care and respect. Good intimacy between a husband and wife in crucial in order to have a successful and happy conjugal life.
Lastly, you must never disclose anything regarding your intimate relationships with any other individual. This is because, it is recipe for disaster, which may cause havoc on your married life.