Most people these days don’t get compulsory Islamic knowledge about how to perform certain worships in a proper manner, what are the haram things, how to keep yourself away from haram, and so on. This is the consequence of young boys and girls getting too close to each other before marriage. Shockingly, a number of western Muslims don’t know whether is it haram to kiss before marriage or not!
In the Muslim countries, people know that kissing before marriage is haram. Still, they engaged in such an act due to negligence. So, what if you kiss before marriage in Islam? Does it have any effect on marriage? This article will answer all your queries regarding this matter.
Ruling of Kissing in Islam Before Marriage
Most people know that kissing a non-mahram is haram before marriage. But is there any reference that forbids this action? Yes, absolutely. There are several hadith as well as verses indicating this matter. However, the most specific hadith that forbids this action is –
Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said, “It is better for a Muslim to have a nail driven into their head than to touch someone who is not of close relations to them (non-mahram).”
So, based on the above-mentioned hadith, we can come to a conclusion that it is not permissible for a Muslim man or woman to touch or kiss or come to other physical conducts with a non-mahram.
Is Kissing Before Marriage Zina?
Although zina primarily indicates the actual fornication and adultery, all the things that lead to the zina are also considered as zina. There is a hadith regarding this specific issue –
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said, “Allah has decreed for every son of Adam his share of zina, which he will inevitably commit. The zina of the eyes is looking, the zina of the tongue is speaking, one may wish and desire, and the private parts confirm that or deny it.” (Bukhaari, 5889; Muslim, 2657)
So, touching a non-mahram person with a sexual desire is considered as a zina of hands, kissing is the zina of both tongue and touch, looking is the zina of eyes, which utlimately lead to the zina of private part, which is fornication or adultery.
That is the reason why Islam forbids kissing, dating, touching, lustful talking before marriage in the first place to close all the doors things that lead to zina.
Romance in Islam Before Marriage
Now that it is clear why kissing before marriage is considered a haram act, you may ask ‘what about making romance with someone before marriage?’
As long as you see someone and fall in love with that person, there is nothing wrong with it. But if that ‘falling in love’ thing leads to any haram act such as talking unnecessarily with that person, staring at her with temperature and affection, touching, and going for a date, such a romance will be haram in the eyes of Shariah. This romance will be a major sin, and there will be consequences of it.
Seeing Someone Before Marriage
There is nothing wrong for a man to see a woman for the purpose of marriage. In fact, it is encouraged in Islam to see the potential spouse based on the following hadith –
Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said, “When a man is going to ask for the hand of a woman with a purpose of marriage if he is able to look at what will induce him to marry her, he should do so.” (Abu Dawood, 2082)
Both Muslim men and women can come in casual physical contact with their mahrams. Mahrams of men are all Muslim men, parents, grandparents, siblings of parents, own siblings, spouses, parents of spouses, off-springs, etc.
For women, their mahrams are, all Muslim women, parents, grandparents, own siblings, siblings of parents, spouses, parents of spouses, and off-springs.
But to avoid fitnah, a man shouldn’t kiss on the cheek of an adult mahram woman. Similarly, a woman shouldn’t touch or kiss on the cheek of an adult mahram man.
Although kissing on the cheek is considered as a custom in many Muslim countries, it is only allowed for the same sex individuals.
What to Do If Someone Kissed Before Marriage?
If you had kissed someone before marriage, whether it is the person you are going to get married with or someone else, it is not the end of the world of your marriage journey. The door of repentance is still open. All it takes for you to repeat to Allah SWT with sincerity, and your previous sin will be erased, and replaced with reward.
There is a hadith indicating exactly this specific situation –
Ibn Mas’ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported, “A man kissed a woman. So, he came to the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and informed him about it. Then Allah revealed this verse: “And perform the prayer, between the two ends of the day and in some hours of the night. Verily, the good deeds efface the evil deeds (i.e., minor sins).” (11:114) The man asked the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) whether this applies to him only. The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “It applies to all of Muslims.” (Sahih Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
What is haram before marriage in Islam?
Sexual, lustful, and affectionate acts such as kissing, touching, staring, etc. are haram in Islam before marriage because these are considered portions of zina, which lead to the actual zina itself.
What does Islam say about relationship before marriage?
Loving someone is not a sin. But if that love leads to kissing, touching, and other lustful and affectionate acts, then that particular love or relationship will be haram.
If two people love each other, they do not date, talk to each other unnecessarily out of affection, touch, kiss, each other, then it is not a problem. But, they should get married as soon as possible to protect themselves from doing anything haram.
What is the punishment for kissing in Islam?
Islam doesn’t impose any capital punishment one individuals just for kissing each other. The punishment is only imposed for the case of adultery or fornication if there are 4 witnesses of their haram act.
Is love bite haram?
Love bite between a husband and a wife is completely halal as long as it does not cause any severe physical issue. Sometimes love bites cause too much blood clotting, which can lead to serious injury or even death. So, couples should be aware of it.
If you have made this far, hope that now you know whether is it haram to kiss before marriage or not. Think about this way, if you are going to marry that person, if you guys are involved in something haram before marriage, it can bring consequences in your marital life.